I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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