apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
