We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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