You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
