i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
