Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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