Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
