What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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