"it" just moved
North Korea, Best Korea!
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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