let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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