Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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