either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I met the friendliest cop last night
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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