Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Everything about him screamed your future.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
