All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
