Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
You pole danced in your parka.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
