ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
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