so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Randomize
