In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
