Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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