Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
