You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Randomize
