I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
