she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Randomize
