i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
