girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
