So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
