my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
