we're chasing vodka with high fives
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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