Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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