If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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