Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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