yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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