told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
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