you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
