Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
