Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
