Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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