I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
