She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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