She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
