he thought i was a dude.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
That reminds me...we need to get swords
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
