ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Found the puke drawer
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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