Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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