loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
