we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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