Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Randomize