you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Even the bartender felt bad for me
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Randomize
