the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
