i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Michael Bay diarrhea
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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