whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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