Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
