Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I wish I only lived at night.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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